The great great Ben and Marty meet up

[obsession]

Yes the cancer thing sucks I lost my dad at 57 to bowl cancer ,he was a country bar manager and lived hard ,we spoke very little he was tough and expected the same a big man and a big heart too. Theres not a day that goes by that I don't miss him or wish I had said more But hes in a better place now and I only ever think of the good times we shared and now I understand why he was so hard on us sometimes the discipline that we receive turns out to be the seed of love and respect we just don't realize it at the time.Im sure the time you spent with him although short as it seemed will stay with you forever, some moments cant be forgotten some smiles and the faces we learn to appreciate , (often too late), are the faces and experiences that make us who we are our parents often say how proud they are of us but in hindsight I wish I had told him how proud I was that he was my dad even if some times I thought the worst of him.now I know now he thought the best of me.
make every day count, and remember its never too late.

[eddy]

I recently turned 50, I have 3 grown up boys, 25, 22 & 21, at the party I put friendly pressure on all of my family, ( I have 6 brothers and 7 sisters) to speak about their relationship with me. My nieces and nephews also got up and spoke. This was not for an ego trip because in my family I am seem to be the talk guy, you know the one who takes the service and speaks at family and relatives funerals, the one who speaks at weddings and important birthdays, the one who when something goes wrong they ring for advice. I'm the only one who doesn't drink so I'm sober enough at gatherings to speak from the heart, so I thought it was about time that they said something be it good or bad about me, I also put pressure on my sons to speak and was totally suprised by what they said ..... seems I'm not such a bad bugger after all, they were really good speakers and the comments were suprising some things they mentioned went back years, it showed how important things that you consider to be insignificant can have a major impact on others lives.

Lesson I learnt .... this was an opportunity for those close to you to express directly to you how they feel about you (even if some of it is through their beers). This is something I never did with my parents and although I have no regrets I would have liked to have told them how I felt about them when they were not suffering. The last three days with my old man was an opportunity and a time to forgive and it is a time I will always cherish. I spent a week sleeping at the hospital in the waiting rooms when my mum was passing away and again that was important to me and something the nursing staff understood. I believe when we have fall outs with family it is still important to let them know how we feel, I asked my sisters and brothers when one of my brothers crossed them if they would go to his funeral, they said of course they would, I asked wether they would feel angry towards him, they said no. I asked them why they wouldn't tell him that while he was alive? they had no answer, just looked at me in a strange manner. Funny isn't it how our anger or pride stops us from making it right with family. Stop now ..... go to the phone and ring a family member and tell them you love them! I bet when you hang up you will feel good for doing it  stay well and look after yourselves

[Tweaker]

Nice One Eddy!

[Marishka]

im sorry 2 hear u lost ur mum Scoobiedoovan it leaves a scar on our hearts that never heals. lost my mum April 3rd this year . im  sorry 2 hear u lost ur dad Craig, and Doofhard my sorrow to u 2 brother. loosing mums, dads brothers ,sisters, friends there is nothing worse,  we loose a bit of our selves, and to anyone else thats lost or going through hard times my thoughts ,prayers and blessings are sent to thee.
dad had his triple bypass tuesday,
went ok, but his lungs collapsed,
he,s still in intensive care today.
he,s confused, cant move very much and depressed.
i told him 2 eat as much as he can , breath deeply and always think positive.
he said he finds it hard 2, but i told him loose ur spark and u loose the battle.
and i said i will be upset with him if he gives up.
marty

 

[doofhard]

Exactly right Marty.  All about positive thought.  I'm sending all my positive thoughts to you and you old man.

[Marishka]

thanx Doofhard ur a great guy.
do u realise we have the same last name?
wonder if were related.lol
my ancestors are from ireland.
gortmellia, beautiful place in ireland, all my relo,s own pubs,
mum n dad did as well, wish they were all in Aus. hehe
marty

[doofhard]

Your not too shabby yourself Marty
Well as much as i'd happily be related to you, it's not the case my Dad was adopted and his "real" surname is Tonkin (only found out a year or so ago)  He;s got people trying to track down the Mother now.  Was a bit of a spin out when he got the informaton thus far.  His Dad was a labourer already had 2 girls (this is who my Dad would love to track down) and then when Dad was born the old man split and left his Mum with 3 kids. 

Wish my family owned pubs.  I love my travel though, these pubs you talking about they in Ireland?  Maybe a visit is in order.  How bigs this sailing boat you got?

[Marishka]

lol, thanx man. i wish u well with the family tree search.
yes they are in ireland and england.
love my traveling also, im a gypsy at heart and always will be.
i dont have the yacht of my dreams yet but its in the pipework.
a 50ft bilge keeled able 2 sit on beach upright, twin mast in case 1 snaps at sea in storm ( ratshit if in 1 masted yacht), capable of long distance travel,
QLD, whitsundays, etc
 Bahamas, Carabean etc. anythings possible.
just need to watch out for moidern day pirates if venture over and  through panama canal
we only live once, may as well enjoy it hey.
marty
 

[Dano]

Haven't been on for while .... so sorry to hear and feel your pain Marty i pray for your father and family in these difficult times, I too recently went through a very similar circumstance, but made the mistake of being too busy to be by the bedside. Your dad needs you in this time mate, tell him we're all with him and he's in our thoughts, God bless.

[Tweaker]

Blessings to you Marty!